The Clarity of Hindsight

Since ancient times no one has heard, no ear has perceived, no eye has seen any God besides you, who acts on behalf of those who wait for him. (Is 64:4)

Hindsight is twenty-twenty. It’s a cliché because it’s true. When I look back over a situation, I always have more clarity than when I am in the middle of it. While I may not understand completely, I do find lessons and areas of growth I couldn’t see at the time.

That’s the case with the recent quarantine. While many are still quarantined for various reasons—their health or the health of a loved one, their level of exposure to someone with the virus, the area where they live—most of the US has started opening up to some degree. So I may not have enough hindsight yet, but lessons are emerging.

The early days of the lockdown reminded of the time I lived in Germany in the late 1990s. When I was nineteen, I married, and my then-husband joined the Army. After completing basic training and AIT, he was stationed in Germany.

At that point, I hadn’t been out of the country or even on a plane. My family traveled a lot by car, and I had seen most of the western half of the United States. But for the most part, I stayed close to home, even commuting my first year of college and coming home every weekend my second year.

Moving to Germany produced a type of culture shock that I had never before experienced. Suddenly, I was in a foreign country where I didn’t speak the language, know the laws, or understand the customs. But the worst part, by far, was the isolation. Even though I was married, my then-husband was often away on maneuvers for weeks at a time. When he wasn’t training, he played sports with other men in his unit. I often traveled with the team so that I could spend time with him, but I was usually the only woman there. It was a completely different life, one I never really figured out how to navigate.

The recent lockdown reminded me of those long-ago days. The shock of going from my normal world to a foreign one. The isolation. The struggle to figure out God’s plan. The confusion about what my role was in his plan.

Eventually, I made friends in Germany. I found ways to pass the time, to connect with others, and to grow closer to God. Looking back, I can see that those experiences shaped the woman I am today.

No matter what happens, no matter the fear or uncertainty, God is my rock and my strength. As long as I stay connected to him, I am never truly alone. While I couldn’t see the purpose of my isolation in Germany all those years ago, I now see how it prepared me for today. As hard as some days are, I know it would be harder if I didn’t have that experience to draw from. I know it will end. I know there is support. I know God will never leave me, no matter how dark the days seem. I know, because I’ve been there, and I’ve made it through with God at my side.

Dear Jesus, thank you for lessons I can apply to my current situation that allow me to learn and grow closer to you. I pray for all those still in quarantine, still in isolation, and for you to draw close to them and comfort them. Amen.